Just a couple more days and September will end once again.  It's that time of year when the sun begins to slink away a little earlier, a little faster, each evening, stepping down to take its rest while the moon dominates the sky and the crisp air gives way to the stars.  The trees will give up holding onto their leaves, but not before a final display of color, showing off what they can do before letting go and bracing themselves for the Winter's cold.  It's this time of year that I, too, feel as though it's time to retreat, to rethink and once again focus on what I really want.  While the Spring rejuvenates me and the Summer makes me want to be outside whenever possible, the Autumn is an unwelcome return to life spent indoors for what feels like eternity.  The days go by at a snail's pace, only to bring in frost and force me under the covers to find warmth.  The only good thing about this is I actually get some work done, since I'm no longer distracted by the sun shining brightly and the birds cutting through the warm air.  But this time of year also always seems to mark the return of my impatience and questions.  I once again find myself knowing what I want and realizing I haven't been able to find the means towards attaining it just yet, hoping that the day will come soon when I will no longer be walking alongside the track I should be on, but rather be on the track itself.  I find myself realizing that, while I thought I could compromise and be okay with the way things are, I am utterly unable to settle.  I realize that it's a long way to Spring again, and I dread what's lying in wait for me cloaked in ice and snow.  Every year this happens, but every Spring nothing changes, so the cycle continues, and I hope every year that this will be the year that changes things for the better, the year in which I can find my directions as easily as I can in Mapquest or a GPS.  The lazy Summer days have a knack for bringing out my complacency, but the cold air snaps reality right back into my face.  So here I am again, at the edge of October's rebirth, scrambling for light in the dark evenings, knowing that it will soon extend into dark afternoons when the only light is artificial.  I hope that this time around I'll be able to keep the sun of my soul warm and bright, remaining calm and centered, never losing focus.  It's time I stop compromising my future; it's time I stop thinking of other ways to get by, thinking that those will bring happiness.  It's time to find the focus and hold onto it, never letting my eyes waver from my resolution.  This Winter will be harsh and cold; here's to hoping I can keep my fire burning until the sun takes over again.       

- Lisa Selvaggio